Chapter 2 SeXStoRY

I am getting SOOOOOOOOOOOOO sick of seeing all your tallywackers! I KNOW girls don't want to see them, either. I've read enough of them TELLING you so! What would your mother think?!? Guys, can't you come up with something different for a profile picture? Try something a little more original! A picture of an elephant's trunk, if you just HAVE to show something long and hard. --Or how about a pic of a naked stripper wrapped around a stripper pole with her tongue touching the pole... Now THAT would be sexy! But your pitiful peepee? Come on! Give us a break! I'd venture to say that just about every shave leg on this web site has already seen a pecker just like yours. Believe me, they're NOT impressed looking at yours. I'm sure every one of those marvelous, darling creatures has heard every line there is to tell by the time she reaches puberty. Nothing you come up with is going to impress her, but yet since this is the Internet and we're all pretty anonymous here you think you can go wild and show just how much of a moron you can be. I bet you grope girls in the dark between street lights! How about showing her something new and different, like maybe just be yourself? Works for me. Keep your pickle covered and zipped until the girl TELLS you she wants to see it. She will, eventually, if you really deserve it. If you don't deserve it you both can turn away feeling good about yourselves and holding your heads high. If you deserve it, she might even do the unzipping and take matters in hand herself! Now THAT would be awesome, wouldn't it? Besides, yours is nothing to brag about. I know. I have the only perfect one in the world. God made it 'specially for me 'cause he knew I'd take care of it. Then after considering the matter He felt sorry for you and He swept up the trimmings and made one for you. True story. Trust me. I don't think I have a picture of my perfect phallus anywhere on my profile. There are plenty pics of pussies, though! Those wonderful God-given marvels that every woman and girl has which give us such indescribable pleasure! You betcha! We, every mother's son of us, crawl out of one and then spend the rest of our lives trying to crawl back into another one! And the absolutely wonderous, marvelous unbelievable thing about it is that so many of these heavenly angels actually WANT to let us! If they didn't we wouldn't have much of a human race, now would we? Which brings us to the Golden Rule. You think you know what that is, I'll bet. --But you'd be wrong! She Who Has the Pussy Makes The Rules. Write that down. It'll be on the finals. This is why we get up in the dark and go out into the cold to earn the gold, to give the best we can give for these angels who have the pussies that make the rules. They so richly and righteously deserve every morsel of consideration we can give them. THAT's the Golden Rule, and it's kept the world turning for a LOOOOOOONG time! I'm going to give a test every Friday, but if you're lucky enough to meet that perfectly beautiful angel (you know, the one who is everything you've ever dreamed about, the one who comes down in a sun beam from the clouds above with cherubs singing and trumpets blowing, the one who can crush you with just a wave of her hand or a frown on her face ...THAT one) If you meet her before the next test, SHE will give you a pop quiz. That quiz is weighted and will count more than any final I can come up with! Be good. Play nice. Your mother is watching.